This morning we went on a silent meditational walk along the beach as the sky changed shades of pinks and blues. The water was very still and became a mirror making the sky and the ocean the same color with no horizon in sight. It was a beautiful way to start the day. Kanti Devi brought her guitar and as we were singing hymns and chants the birds lined up on the shore in front of us in silence – not the typical squawking you hear from them. It was as if we were all at one with nature, with God and we were all at peace. Occasionally for our morning lesson we open up one of Swami Sivananda’s books, the Upanishads, to a random page and read a letter he has written somebody in the past. Today’s letter was on page 273.
“You have wasted much of your life. A little time is left. Make the best use of it. You too can realize God and be ever happy.”
“Fear not. The mind is no doubt extremely turbulent. Through repeated attempts you can perfectly subdue it. You are the master of the mind. By constant practice and non-attachment assert your mastery. Feel the power, bliss and splendor that results from Self conquest. Curb the mind ruthlessly. Annihalate desire. When desire dies, the mind is your slave. Become desireless and be victorious. May you rest in your pristine freedom!”
I am glad this message came up today because I have been very introverted these past two days trying to figure out what I am experiencing here. I think I am feeling the non-attachment we keep learning about, it is a step on the spiritual path, but it feels very strange. I am so used to being goal and career-oriented, always wanting to do more and be more and now all of a sudden I am just happy where I am. I have everything I want in life and I have no attachment to any physical location, material things, job, goals, etc. This doesn’t mean I am going to just sit here on the beach and meditate for the rest of my life but I am learning to let go, to be at peace and be happy in the present moment. I don’t have to wait until I achieve a goal in the future – I am blissful just to be me, right here, right now.